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About Varied / Student Member maria a.k.a the jewFemale/United States Groups :iconcentalia: Centalia
 
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Art.
That is appealing.
Yeah.


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Braginskey's Profile Picture
Braginskey
maria a.k.a the jew
Artist | Student | Varied
United States

what is the up my homies


names maria and im just a sad cat with some friends and aph russia


i'm very awkward


even behind the computer screen


please don't look at my old art/journaLS THAT WAS MY WEEABOO PHASE


well basically I like drawing Ivan, my leopets/neopets and acnl peeps


i don't really use this account for posting things anymore, but i still use it for rping. my other account (art an shit) is "estonias"


so anyway, feel free to talk to me! i'm awkward but I don't bite!

Interests

who's ready for a journal rant lmaooo

so?
today has been fairly okay except for a few things

i can not find my pokemon x game. like we did a massive clean up/paint of my room and during that time we moved everything out of it and it thought i put it somewhere safe? but i can't find it now and i really wanted to play it today but no :/

and then this design i made isn't selling on dA and i really want points and it's a little frustrating because i've seen so many 1 point designs sell and i feel like i really put effort into this thing and it's not selling and im sad and a little disappointed
i've put it up on another site to sell it now but i still don't know if it'll sell. i really hope so.

and now finally i get to use my laptop after i've been wanting to all day (it's like...midnight here) but the internet is going really slow and deviantart's sucky new layout is making it a billion times worse and im just...ugh right now.
descriptive rping would rlly help rn but i still haven't found any new rp partners bc i am shy and partially worthless

in other words, im just :/ right now
  • Mood: Unhappy
  • Listening to: hella music
  • Reading: why isnt there a "type ur own mood" option
  • Watching: like really there is no emotion that says ":/"
  • Playing: literally none whatsoever
  • Eating: :/
  • Drinking: hella rad water

Activity


Kitten Icon by Braginskey
Kitten Icon

my tumblr rp blog needed a new icon of kitten so yesterday i got off my lazy ass and drew her.
decided that since she fights with a sword and is around other people who use similar weapons so she needed more scars to be more believable.
she now has one on her nose and two on her neck.
Loading...

who's ready for a journal rant lmaooo

so?
today has been fairly okay except for a few things

i can not find my pokemon x game. like we did a massive clean up/paint of my room and during that time we moved everything out of it and it thought i put it somewhere safe? but i can't find it now and i really wanted to play it today but no :/

and then this design i made isn't selling on dA and i really want points and it's a little frustrating because i've seen so many 1 point designs sell and i feel like i really put effort into this thing and it's not selling and im sad and a little disappointed
i've put it up on another site to sell it now but i still don't know if it'll sell. i really hope so.

and now finally i get to use my laptop after i've been wanting to all day (it's like...midnight here) but the internet is going really slow and deviantart's sucky new layout is making it a billion times worse and im just...ugh right now.
descriptive rping would rlly help rn but i still haven't found any new rp partners bc i am shy and partially worthless

in other words, im just :/ right now
  • Mood: Unhappy
  • Listening to: hella music
  • Reading: why isnt there a "type ur own mood" option
  • Watching: like really there is no emotion that says ":/"
  • Playing: literally none whatsoever
  • Eating: :/
  • Drinking: hella rad water
tbh...this make my internet go even slower and it's fuckin dumb if people want to make updates they can use a journal what the hell dA we didn't ask for this :/
doesnt this kinda take away the need for a shoutbox
i do everything right
i'm nice, i'm kind to others, i give when i can

im a shy person
and my worst fear
is rejection

rejection - everytime i am rejected, it makes me feel horrible inside.
as if i've done something...wrong.

roleplaying, for example.
it makes me feel very happy.
creating my own character as an escape.
kitten makes me happy.

i've taken her through the wringer and back
i've broken her, i've repaired her
i've drawn her and i've redesigned her

i've perfected her in every way and now i wish to roleplay

but they say no
they stop roleplaying with me
they unfollow me and stop our threads

why?
she has a decent background
she isn't too dependant on any character
she has flaws
she has development

it's either because she has cat ears or because
she's an oc

if she were human in apperance, she'd probably have at least a few more roleplays
but
imagine if she were a canon character

you never see canon character blogs just...stay in the dark
canon characters get all of the threads
all of the roleplays

i made my first mistake when i told a blog that she and their character were already best friends
they dropped the thread within two days and unfollowed me

my second mistake?
i don't know

they said they were going to make a thread - and they did. i replied.
however, then i lost my internet.
once it was restored, i replied to them.
they never replied back.
i messaged them, kindly telling them about the reply.
nothing.
then, they unfollowed me too, despite still following my main account.

my third mistake?
having kitten be herself, i guess

i chose to make her a shapeshifter because i like cats and i wanted a cat character, but not an anthro or a fulltime cat. she became a shapeshifter. i made it so she would have cat ears and a tail though, as a side effect of shapeshifting so much.

but everyone has something against "nekos", they call them. why?
is it my fault it is something i wanted for my character?
is it my fault everyone thinks a neko girl is going to be a "marysue?"

if that's the case, i shouldn't even develop them. why should i? if she can be perfect then why not? why should i put time into making her character dislike this and like that, with her own backstory and setting?

if people assume she's going to be a mary sue, i might as well just say that she's married to ivan already with three children, because that's how bad people treat her. they treat her as if she is destined to be a mary sue.

kitten used to be a mary sue, unable to die, always knew what to say...
but now she is human
she is unsure of herself
she has no family
she is no longer dependant on russia for her backstory
she is an immortal empire who now no longer exists.
she should be in heaven right now, gone and forgotten, but she is still alive. why?
someone, somewhere remembers her.

she does not have the perfect life.

but nobody wishes to get that far into her character.

my roleplaying skills are wonderful.
i always check for typos
i will trim the thread if on my laptop
i think i am a good writer and i try to use correct everything while writing.

if i can't make good ocs, draw good, write good...
then what is there left?

if people would just...give me a chance...

i could be a russia
i could
i think i am able to portray his character well

but if i were, it'd just be another russia related url
just another same general lines
same character
same traits
same everything
no room to create anything new
everything would remain the same

i've considered making a russia blog
im sure that would get followers
asks
threads

but i want to create
i want the world to see what i can make
i want the world to give kitten a chance

but they give her as much of a chance as they would a snowball in hell.

i'm afraid and ashamed to ask anyone new to roleplay with me

and that's wrong
but i can't change that.

just a little ramble
im really tired of being rejected every time i try to reach out
im also really considering scraping kitten as a character

but the two rp partners that have accepted her are hella rad 

but people just dont seem to get to know her and im really fucking tired of it 
  • Mood: Sadness
  • Listening to: hella music
  • Reading: nothing
  • Watching: hella
  • Playing: ogre battle
  • Eating: uwu
  • Drinking: hella rad water

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:iconmarikfan333:
marikfan333 Featured By Owner 5 days ago  Student General Artist
The skeleton army has risen 
Reply
:iconbraginskey:
Braginskey Featured By Owner 4 days ago  Student General Artist

step one complete
Reply
:iconkatnappe-gurl:
katnappe-gurl Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!! *gives you a cake and Ivan pops out* (; 
Reply
:iconbraginskey:
Braginskey Featured By Owner Oct 4, 2014  Student General Artist

perfect
Reply
:iconkatnappe-gurl:
katnappe-gurl Featured By Owner Oct 6, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
HOT
Reply
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